Jokes

An old man was walking along the road. A car stopped near him and a got out of it. He asked the old man, Sir, shall I give you a lift?
The old man replied, No need I live on the ground floor.

Two pupils were fighting outside the examination hall. The teacher came out and said:
T : Why r u fighting?
S : Teacher, he left his answer sheet blank
T : Why should that bother you?
S : I too left my answer sheet blank
T : So?
S : The teacher will think that we have copied from each other. 

Professor : What three words are the most used by college students?
Student : I don't know.
Professor : Absolutely correct. 

Conductor : Why are you getting an extra ticket?
Passenger : If I lose one ticket, the other would save me.
C : What would you do if you lose both?
P : I am not a fool. I have my bus pass. 
Lady : The design of the sari is excellent. But the colour is not good.
Salesman : Don't worry mam. The colour will disappear after the first wash. 

Teacher : I killed a person, convert this sentence into future tense.
Student : The future tense you will go to jail. 

Mother : Reena, tell me why does a bear have it's body covered with hair?
Daughter : Actually Mom, there is no barber in the forest.